At the beginning of the 21st Century monsters still roam the remote, and sometimes not so remote, corners of our planet. It is our job to search for them. The Centre for Fortean Zoology [CFZ] is - we believe - the largest professional, scientific and full-time organisation in the world dedicated to cryptozoology - the study of unknown animals. Since 1992 the CFZ has carried out an unparalleled programme of research and investigation all over the world. Since 2009 we have been running the increasingly popular CFZ Blog Network, and although there has been an American branch of the CFZ for over ten years now, it is only now that it has a dedicated blog.

Sunday, 2 February 2014


The Crypto-Alphabet in Verse
(Descriptions in it are quite terse)

[NB - Metre varies from stanza to stanza]

A  The Almasty is full of pep,
     It frolics on the Russian steppe
     And if to Daghestan you flew
     You'd find Almasties down there too.

B  The Bigfoot in the Forests lives,
     It has an Awful Stench.
     I would not join a Bigfoot who
     Was sitting on a bench.

C  The Chupacabras sucks the blood
     Of goats; he's seldom sated
     And, when he's finished with the goat
     It is exsanguinated.

D  The Dobharchu's a giant otter.
     You should watch it pounce.
     It has a lengthy Irish name
     Few people can pronounce.

E  The Ezox was a giant fish
     Which in the Danube flourished
     And people wondered at its size
     Perhaps 'twas over-nourished.

F  The Filey Monster was observed
     In 1934.
     And it, as far as I'm aware,
     Has not been seen no more.

G  The Gob Monster will much annoy
      The miners up in Illinois
      For, when the miners' lights go out,
      It will attack, if it's about.

H  The Herrington Lake Monster
      You'll see if you're lucky
      In Herrington Lake
      Which is in Kentucky.

I    The Igopogo lives in Lake Simcoe,
      That's in the province of Ontario.

J  The Jersey Devil, if accounts are true,
     Looks somewhat like a flying kangaroo.

K  I fear the Kongamato!  It's a beast
     That looks as if it likes a grisly feast.
     It has the aspect of a pterosaur
     And wallows (I suspect) in blood and gore.

L  The Loch Ness Monster that dwells in Loch Ness
     Swims in the water with extreme finesse.

M  Point Pleasant, West Virginia, is where
      You'll see the Mothman gliding through the air.

N  The Nandi Bear, accounts of which perused
     By me, have left me totally confused.

O  The Ogopogo several people saw.
      It's now protected by Canadian Law.

P  The Phoenix is a bird of gold and red
     And rises from its ashes, it is said.

Q  The Questing Beast was chased by Pellinore,
      Who then was slain, so chased the Beast no more.

R  Of the Red Horse Lake Monster it is said
     Its tubes to breathe are mounted on its head.

S  The Serpent of the Stormy Seas, I feel,
     May nothing be but an Enormous Eel.

T  The Thunderbird can carry off a whale.
     I'm told that this will make the whale quite pale.

U  How many people chased the Unicorn
     Attempting to procure its wondrous horn.
     And reader, you, if you a virgin be,
     Can Unicorns approach quite easily.

V  The Velue is a hairy creature.
     That is its most outstanding feature.

W  The Werewolf may purloin a hen or pullet,
      But you can kill him with a silver bullet,
      So then, if from a Werewolf you're in danger,
      At once for help enlist the bold Lone Ranger.

X  The Chinese wildman is known as the Xeren,
     In other parts of China called the Yeren.

Y  In Himalayan Mountains lives the Yeti.
     I wonder if it ever eats spaghetti.
     Professor Sykes, with academic flair,
     Proclaims it's not an ape, it is a bear.

Z  The Zeegangsa, a monster of the sea,
     Is friendly and will not eat you or me.

Yeti, perhaps about to seize hapless wanderer.     

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